The Causeway, Sunday Late Afternoon

[firstofitskind]

Liam had been holding himself together by, basically, the skin of his teeth ever since they'd left the Sour Nest. It was unfamiliar territory, he needed to be on guard, he could not afford to let himself fall apart.

Then the portal dropped them back off on the island, and everything just hit him like a metaphorical freight train.

He'd been trying so hard to keep the guard's- Tomas, he had a name- memories separate from his own but they were there, they were loud, and it wasn't just him, it was Robert, it was all the bodies Ha'gel had worn through his years of studying various cultures.

There were so many. So many voices, thoughts, memories, all coming through at once. He couldn't do this. He didn't want this.

He needed it to stop.

His face went slack, eyes blank as he retreated inside himself, away from the chaos and the noise of it all. He just wanted it to be quiet again, that wasn't too much to ask, was it?

[ooc: for anyone who might have reason to be around! pings will be slowish while i am at work.]

Comments

[firstofitskind]

But there were so many of them, and only one of him, and they were so loud.

"You need not sacrifice every aspect of your life to them. You need not sacrifice us."

But it turned out that she was wrong. For after he expressed his regret, after he Shared of himself with her for another long, delicious moment, she heard the faint, low growls of displeasure. This body reacted without thought, jumping up to face those who approached from behind.

She was one of the Kimera and they knew it. Her grip tightened on his hand, hard enough to have broken bones had he too not been other.

She willed him the last of her memories as they killed her...

“They’re too loud,” he complained. “Too many.”

[arboreal_priestess]

"Yes, but I need you to focus on the one that recognizes me," Verity said, her voice firm and loud - though not yelling. More like the stern voice of a teacher in a classroom of rambunctious toddlers.

Or a choreographer in a room full of excited dancers, which was often very similar.

"Listen to me and push away any of them that don't know this voice."

[firstofitskind]

A bark of slightly hysterical laughter at that, because one of those other voices did recognize her, but she wouldn't want that one.

It felt like his mind and his body both were fighting him as he tried to do as she asked, fingers curling down to grip her hand in his, squeezing a bit tighter than was probably comfortable for Verity.

[arboreal_priestess]

Like she didn't know Robert was still there, c'mon Liam. But dealing with just him was a hell of a lot easier than this slew of others.

She winced, but her grip didn't slacken on his hand as she kept talking. "Liam. Five things you can see, right now."

[firstofitskind]

"You," he recited. "Beau. The school. Ocean. Teüe tolova."

[arboreal_priestess]

"English, Liam," Verity said, voice sharp. "Say them again in English."

[firstofitskind]

"You. Beau. School. Ocean. Sky." Liam managed to grit out.

[arboreal_priestess]

"Good, good," she said. "And now four that you can feel. Feel right now, with your own body."

[firstofitskind]

“Wrong,” Liam muttered. “I feel wrong.”

Probably not the answer she’d been looking for.

[arboreal_priestess]

Verity poked him. "Then stop dragging people into your brain when you can't control it," she growled. "Four things. You can feel."

[firstofitskind]

It had seemed like a good idea at the time?

“You- you’re holding my hand?” Liam said hesitantly.

That was one thing, at least?

[arboreal_priestess]

It always did. But then it led to this.

"Liam, I know you can count to four," she said.

If nothing else, the grumping over this was still pulling him back into mental focus, which was the whole point.

[firstofitskind]

It was still hard, though, to sort through what was his and what wasn’t.

“My shirt, the ground...” he frowned, trying to think of one more. “... Cold,” he decided. Because he was pretty sure it was colder here than where he’d just been.

[arboreal_priestess]

Verity couldn't judge comparative temperatures, but it was pretty brisk out, so it counted enough for her. "Good," she said. "Now three things you can hear."

Beat.

"The voices in your head don't count, so don't even try."

She was onto you, mister.

[firstofitskind]

"Your voice," he shot back immediately. Then frowned, wondering if it was cheating, since she'd been his first answer to every single one of those questions so far. "Beau. The ocean."

[arboreal_priestess]

Hey, she was just happy that he was focusing on her and not so deep inwards he couldn't be reached.

"Good, Liam, you're doing really good," she said, voice gentling. "Two things you smell."

[firstofitskind]

It had been quiet, there, and that's all he'd really wanted.

"Your shampoo," she was his touchstone, his tether, after all. "The island?" By which he meant the mix of salt air and damp stonework he associated with this place.

[arboreal_priestess]

Quiet didn't make it good. Quiet didn't make it safe. You know what else was quiet? The patch of forest where the bromeliads had been.

"And one last thing," Verity murmured. "One thing you can taste."

[firstofitskind]

It had felt safe, though.

He shook his head. "Nothing. I don't know." Unlike last time, he hadn't bitten down on his tongue, there was no blood in his mouth.

[arboreal_priestess]

Verity tugged him down, pressing a gentle kiss on his mouth.

[firstofitskind]

"You," he said softly, pulling her in to a hug as her lips left his. He was still shaking, muscles still buzzing with that pins-and-needles sensation but he was definitely more present.

[arboreal_priestess]

And Verity was willing to take those small improvements. "Let's go home," she said. "Figure out what to do next?"

[firstofitskind]

“Yeah, that sounds good,” Liam agreed. Truth be told, he was still just out of it enough that he would’ve gone along with anything right now.

[arboreal_priestess]

Good thing he had a wife to make sure that the only things being suggested were good ideas then.

"C'mon," she said, shifting her arm around his waist to offer a little more support for him. "Wanna take a bath?"

[firstofitskind]

“Mmm,” Liam hummed. A bath did sound like a good idea, honestly. Hadn’t been a lot of time for that sort of thing on the road in Beau and Fjord’s world.

Except-

She would stay with him, right?

He felt stupid and childish even as the thought crossed his mind, but she’d only just barely managed to pull him back to himself, what if she let go and he was lost again?